Crime against women have been on a rise. But when we look at ourselves we realize that these are our basic instincts.  Women get attracted to men. Men get attracted to women. It can’t be denied. Only some are comfortable with it, some are not. Some hide their sexual feelings, some do not. Some can control their desires, some cannot. Men who can’t control their desires sometimes become criminals. Women become victims. Both suffer.

Buddha realized that for a man no sight, smell, taste, sound, touch and thought are more pleasant than a woman’s. Same is for a woman. Hence, refraining from sexual misconduct, forms one of the five basic morality (Panchsheel) to be followed by laymen.

But how can we curb our basic desires of sex? If we observe carefully, what every civilization has done till date is focus on the differences between sexes. Even our language has played a major role in enforcing these differences. (Please read my blog need for a better language.)

Solution? We start consciously to focus on similarities between men and woman.

Try this simple meditation:

Close your eyes and repeat these instructions sequentially every day atleast once.

My hairs are same and function same as a woman’s/man’s.
My forehead is same and function same as a woman’s/man’s.
My eyes are same and function same as a woman’s/man’s.
My nose is same and function same as a woman’s/man’s.
My ears are same and function same as a woman’s/man’s.
My mouth is same and function same as a woman’s/man’s.
My face is same and function same as a woman’s/man’s.
My brain is same and function same as a woman’s/man’s.
My tongue and teeth are same and function same as a woman’s/man’s.
My neck is same and function same as a woman’s/man’s.
My shoulder, arms, palm are same and function same as a woman’s/man’s.
My chest and internal organs are same and function same as a woman’s/man’s.
My stomach and internal organs are same and function same as a woman’s/man’s.
My private parts is same and function same as a woman’s/man’s.
My thighs are same and function same as a woman’s/man’s.
My knees are same and function same as a woman’s/man’s.
My calf and sheen are same and function same as a woman’s/man’s.
My feet are same and function same as a woman’s/man’s.
My toes are same and function same as a woman’s/man’s.

I think and talk like a man/woman because I have a man’s/woman’s body.
I can imagine having a woman’s/man’s body and think like a woman/man.
I fully realize that my mind is neither male nor female. My body makes me think so.

Now open your eyes.

You do not need to remember all the above instructions, but just understand the flow i.e. observing your body from head to toe.

Benefits?

1. You won’t marry or love a woman/man because she/he is a woman/man, but you know and understand each other better.
2. You won’t probably shy from a woman/man.
3. You can love a man and a woman equally.
4. It will be fine to marry a man or a woman or remain single. This can reduce our population considerably. When this happens male/female ratio won’t matter. (Read my blog saving humpty dumpty).
5. Will it take fun out of sex? Probably not. You can better understand your partner’s needs and preferences and make sex more enjoyable for both.
6. Women can feel comfortable and free and not be self-conscious when in public.
7. Women can overcome inferiority complex, fear, disgust, anger, etc acquired through life or enforced by society.
8. A larger acceptance can make our world a better and safe place for a woman to live in.

Let me know your experiences after practicing the above simple meditation. Please do mention whether it increases your sex drive or decreases your sex drive or it is useless. Please also mention the number of days you tried it.

Mind can matter and we can live in a better world where women and men can live and interact better as humans.